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Old 05-22-2013, 05:41 PM
BoringGuy BoringGuy is offline
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Nowhere
Posts: 1,640

Originally Posted by Marcus View Post
^ Beautiful
thanks, you're not too shabby either


LadySFI, if you pay attention you'll notice some similarities between the multitude of train wrecks available to peruse on this site. You will see that people are lying to each other, being possessive and controlling, and withholding critical communication. Now, run through your extensive memory banks and reflect on all of the monogamous relationships which were effortless and flourished under these conditions.

Couldn't think of any? That's because relationships between possessive, controlling, passive (aggressive) people tend to have TONS of drama and end with a bang (which is what you see on these boards). The key to any relationship is for everyone to be honest, respect each-others independence, and speak up when you feel you have something you need to share. Most people know that intuitively, even though they rarely seem to behave accordingly.

One other thing - a lot of the "trainwrecky" stories involve people who are looking for "advice" about how to get someone else to change their behaviour to suit the person posting the question. This can be anything from "my partner is an insensitive prick who cheated and when i found out he said "oh it's because i'm poly" what should i do" to "we are poly but our primaries won't let us spend the night together or eat in restaurants where someone might recognize us, what should we do". Then people will basically say that you can only control yourself, not other people, at which point the person will start 17 new threads asking the same question different ways hoping to get the answer that is the magic bullet and not have to actually confront their own life.
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