Originally Posted by Dagferi
I have been married 12 years and with my boyfriend a year.
Everything is going just fine.
Similar situation here. Been married 13 years, been on & off with other partner for 25 years, spouse has been with their other partner for over a year. No major problems, just minor ones like you'd have with any other relationship. The "secret" is to know yourself and know when something is not "about you"...and knowing when something IS "about you".
This forum is good for some things: learning from other people's mistakes, and figuring out how NOT to treat people or allow oneself to be treated, to name a couple of them.
But by all means, OP, if the things you read here SCARE you, feel free to not be non-monogamous.