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Old 05-21-2013, 10:57 AM
Cleo Cleo is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Europe
Posts: 414
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hannahfluke View Post

I guess I just wanted to let you know that you're not alone in struggling with abandonment issues. I'm right there with you. I do think it'll help to try to enjoy your time with him and not spend all of it talking about emotionally laden topics.
I'm sorry you're also going through this Hannah! I had some good talks with my other lover MrBrown (see previous posts) about the whole thing yesterday. He made me realize that what I wrote upthread:

I suppose to me it feels like our relationship has shifted and changed, but I am the only one who is struggling to find a new balance. He is struggling to find a balance in his relation with Molly, but seems to think that WE are 'okay', and that nothing has changed between us, where as for me it has.

is really a twisted way to think about it. It is my responsibility to find the new balance FOR ME. The fact that C is dealing with it differently does not really matter, I have to take care of me and of how I deal with it. The change is happening no matter what and there is nothing I can do about it. It is my false sense of power that is causing the most anxiety. But yeah, accepting the change is hard.. especially if you are not the one who made the choice to change things. I hope things will feel better for you soon.
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early forties, straight.
the guys: Ren - husband; Curlz - bf of 2 years, Brig - bf of 7 months; Knight - non-sexual bf; MrBrown - it's complicated
Ren's girls: Lou - gf of 2 years, Liz - very new gf
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