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Old 05-21-2013, 01:53 AM
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Marcus Marcus is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Portland, OR
Posts: 1,587

Originally Posted by nouryia View Post
No matter what I end up wanting for, I always feel selfish for wanting it. Like I'm somehow not deserving of it or should not be expecting it. I have a really difficult time articulating my needs and usually end up holding back until it blows up.
That sucks.

I struggle with a similar issue from time to time; it's related to my being passive about my feelings (I think). Most of the time this manifests in my agreeing to things that I really ought to say "no" to. Then I end up resenting the person for "pushing me around", but there was no pushing taking place. It is me transferring the responsibility of my actions onto someone else.

It's never a bad thing to be honest about our desires and to take full responsibility for seeing that those desires are taken care of. The idea that we are being "selfish" and therefore should not work get our needs met is just bullshit.
Me: male, 43, straight, non-hierarchical, independent
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