Originally Posted by Kella
Sometimes in talking about the time the hinge spends with each partner, people who don't have little kids forget that "family time" and "spouse date/romantic/sexy time" aren't the same thing. If family togetherness time has to come out of the share devoted to the parental spouse, that person might be (is probably) getting way less actual date/romantic/sexy time than it may look like to the non-parenting partner. The mommy (or daddy) spouse needs "alone time with his/her beloved" too! Just something to keep in mind, anyway.
We all live together. I'm the hinge. The guys are *sort of* friends-but mostly just acquaintance-like in how they relate to one another.
We've lived together for 10 years and are raising kids (there were 5 kids at one time, but only 2 left at home). We also have grandkids in the mix-in fact, Little Pea will be here for the next week because his mommy is at the hospital having the newest grandbaby.
We all see each other every day-which is preferable to me. There was a time we had different homes and I still made a point of at least SEEING each of them EVERY DAY. (there was a year bf lived apart and there was a year that dh lived apart).
But as for romantic/date/sexy time, that is harder to come by with both of them working full time, me in school, kids at home etc. I usually sleep in dh's bed til he leaves for work, then go finish my sleep in bf's room. (dh works early in the am, bf works evening/nights). But-that is almost always SLEEP time in both cases.
We schedule a date each week USUALLY to go out (meaning I get two) but that isn't ALWAYS possible.
Much more focus on being a family as a group and enjoying raising the kids-knowing that when they are all out of the house there will be more free time.
OH! And all of the kids/grandkids/extended families/friends/coworkers etc are fully aware. We are not in any way in the closet. That helps A LOT.