Well, I can tell my husbands insecurities are getting to him and we haven't even done or agree'd to anything.
Last night he fell asleep early. My office is across the hall, and I had gotten a call from a friend, I shut the door as not to wake him or the baby. When I get off the phone I went to walk out of my office, open the door and hes just standing there. I asked him why he was just standing there listening to my conversation and he says "who where you talking to, was it another guy" Um... no, it wasn't. We sat down and talked. He said he felt like he was already starting to get jealous of something that hasn't even happened and he doesn't want to be with another woman and just doesn't understand why I would want to be with another guy. I asked him where this came from and why the day before he seemed excited about it and now he almost seems angry about it and is sneaking around the house like hes going to catch me doing something when im not even doing anything.
I asked him what changed, and he said after we had talked and shortly after were intimate, all that kept running through his head afterwards was another man doing that to me and it bothered him tremendously. He said he felt possessiveness over me and that he should be the only one allowed to be that close to me. It kinda bothers me that he sees me as a possession. Yes we are married, but im not HIS possession.
As of now, I told him I was hurt that he felt this way because he was treating me poorly over it, and we went to bed without saying much more. All he could keep saying was that he felt like he wasn't good enough and that these traits he doesn't possess he wished he did. I kept trying to tell him its of no fault of his own and this has nothing to do with me wanting to find a partner better then him and wanting to leave him. I don't know how many times I could express to him that I love him and love our family.
I think I just feel hurt because I felt like we really opened up about this and I was 100% honest with him and how I felt and I felt like he almost sat and seemed open about it so he could use how I felt to hold it above my head. Maybe im wrong. I know feelings are going to change from day to day, but he went from feeling good about it and discussing boundaries to acting like im sneaking around and already found somebody and treating me like I did something wrong.