When someone comes on for the first time and writes a post that is nothing but a long list of woe, suffering, and "sacrifice", then ends with "i want to give this one last shot", i must infer that they are doing SOMETHING right, because myself - let's put it this way. If it's cold and rainy and dark and you're outside naked and hungry and thirsty, and someone walks by and you ask them "how can i make this work?" i'd say, "looks like it's working for you right now".
tl;dr Seat on chair is broken. Solution: repair legs. Repeat as necessary.