Originally Posted by BoringGuy
I always thought of those "contracts" as part of the BDSM play-experience, a "prop" if you will... Just like restraints or butt-plugs or floggers or whatever else you do. It's supposed to be FUN for everyone, all the time, even when it looks like the sub is not enjoying themselves.
^^ i don't do all those things, just one of them, and it's more like a "kink" for me and not a D/s activity. But i know people, etc...
for those of us in the lifestyle, our relationships aren't play anymore than those of the 'vanilla' world are play or poly relationships are 'play'. As a mistress, I take the gift of submission as an honor and I take my responsibility toward my sub/slave very seriously. While fun IS a rewarding part of the lifestyle, it is much more than that. I take a long time to get to know a partner and to make sure our needs/desires are compatible, just like any vanilla relationship.
Between a dominant and submissive, a contract is an oath of honor where both parties (altho it looks skewed to the dom's benefit I admit) can make their needs known. That contract should be honored by both parties as they would honor any other agreement.