Originally Posted by choctaw103
Well, as far as this document goes, I am not sure specifically what you are asking. The more important issue to me would be that if you are that wounded and still have this many issues with trust, that is what I think that should be the major focus. I have seen other trust situations, while not as complex as yours, be enough to make any other work a moot point. At some point, it would seem to me to be to your advantage to decide whether or not you feel can trust your wife again. I know from previous experience that living in a situation where you can't let go and trust is a miserable existence. If you do feel that you can learn to trust her, then my humble opinion is to get through it and get to it. I know there is pain, and I understand from what I have read there is a willingness on both sides to give and work on things, so I would just think that letting go and believing would benefit you both. If you can't or don't feel you can, then what are you actually working toward?
I know that you both seem like good people that are trying to do the best you can, and I think you deserve to be happy.
I agree with that, but I feel like I have to watch my wife. Old habits are still making appearances, and I'd be a fool to just believe her and trust her right now. I got burned, so I'm steering clear of the fire. I need full disclosure and to be shown that she's trustworthy. I don't think that's unreasonable. Her little omissions aren't doing me any favours either.
Cutting me out of having a say over my kids is a problem. I don't think she realises how big of a problem it was and might still be. She was still doing it up until a couple of weeks ago. If I don't want somebody around my kids, the least she could've done was respected it. She knew the situation was contentious. Why create more problems? Last time I checked, they are half mine.
I'm working towards trusting her, but in the mean time, I do question everything. Her behaviour makes me question her.