Thread: Matt's Thoughts
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Old 05-13-2013, 12:02 PM
Matt Matt is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2013
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Heavy thoughts...

I'm not entirely sure how I feel about something. There is something that was mentioned by a mate who works in the family court system. He's aware of the former polyamorous relationship and Snowflake's relationship with my kids. He explained all the ins and outs, the process, and what could and couldn't be included. Warning or friendly suggestion? I'm thinking it's a warning because his words were cryptic. He knows about my Mrs. making plans behind my back, and this is something she could do behind my back. Reason to be concerned much?

In the region we are moving to, the family court has a provision that would allow my wife's ex to have equal parental responsibilities on paper. It's something they used to do for primarily step-parents or other caretakers directly involved in the upbringing of kids, but it is more open now. I'm sure this would delight my Mrs. and her ex. It doesn't help me to know that the application can be done without my consent. These are the same two people who were planning my kids futures without me, so excuse me if my level of trusting is low. Meaning if my Mrs. wanted it to be done and her old ways haven't changed, she could legally do it, and I'd have to legally fight in family court to have it changed back. I don't think she'd do that, but trust isn't where it used to be. It makes me wonder and question how much she's changed.

If approved, the Parenting or Consent Order would grant responsibilities and rights to her and enable us to still be the legal parents of our kids. With this kind of order, Snowflake could legally have a say in the care of the kids, medical treatments, schools they attend, who they can be around, assist in making decisions with the Mrs. and myself regarding the kids, and all parenting responsibilities. If the order has to be amended, it has to be done in family court and on the record. You can include what you want. I know it's probably a half-decent idea, but I don't know. This would be legally binding. Sorry to say, but I think this is bullshit.

Before, I could just ignore any verbal agreements and all that. Selective memory or honestly forgetting what was said five years ago wasn't impossible. Something legally binding is harder to just ignore because the order must be adhered to. I'm not sure how I feel about her being legally recognised as a co-parent. It's one thing to say it at home. It's another to bring the courts into it.

For the record, I wouldn't go for this, but knowing my wife and her history of going behind my back, I wouldn't put it past her to do this. It's no secret that she wants her ex to have equal say. Legal rights? She'd have a field day. I'm a little concerned. Ry wants what she wants, and that hasn't changed. Neither have those habits of hers.

I don't trust my wife much, but how can I trust that she won't pull some sneaky, underhanded stuff like this after we move? Knowledge is more dangerous than a weapon.

Last edited by Matt; 05-13-2013 at 05:43 PM.
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