I would think a vee is infinitely much easier to manage than a triad, so I am surprised your wife has concerns about it. I think it would do you well to keep discussing her concerns. What, exactly, is she worried about?
I also agree that divorce is a very tough thing to go through and it does require time for a person to heal even if it's what they want. Your potential lover may want time with you as a way to comfort herself, but it could backfire if she is in a very vulnerable state, so I recommend proceeding slowly and to make sure you give her space to process what she's going through. They say it actually takes two solid years for someone to recover from a divorce (this is something I read in a book called 'Crazy Time: Surviving Divorce and Building a New Life').