Originally Posted by LovingRadiance
Seriously-one of the best things we did when the anxiety about Maca's phone took hold of me,
was to agree to put them away. We scheduled "no phone" times for times we were together for sure. Also-we shut the phones off if it was other times and we were together.
Even a few weeks of that helped IMMENSELY.
Much like breaking a bone-you just have to stay off of it for 6 weeks, then you can slowly start using it again.
We made it so there was NO PHONE buzzing around me for a few weeks, then slowly integrated things back to where it's around most of the day-but not during our date, meals, sleep, shower, sexy times.
Its more like I struggle with what I perceive as secret rather than private. Its not rational for me to think that I have any right to what he talks about and to whom yet I don't trust him at the same time. If that makes sense.
I know he chatted with women on line before and I didn't struggle with it. It was when those chats became flirts and then sexting and then meet ups that I lost my sense of trust that he was going from private to secret.
He could stay off his phone around me all he wants. When he isn't around me I know he is on line and on his phone catching up with his new interest, T and who knows what else. Really, I would love to not care and have the attitude that it doesn't matter because we are okay, but as we aren't okay any contact with any other woman is a huge threat right now.
I hope to one day just say "fuck it" throw my hands in the air and get on with my own life for me. Leaving him to do whatever, knowing that at the end of the day, we're good.