Originally Posted by kdt26417
Things do have a way of sorting themselves out over time. If you think you can stand the ick for now, you have a chance to enjoy a more stable relationship dynamic later on.
Yes, I can deal with it for now. I will have another serious conversation with my husband though, because I feel that his way of handling things is hurting both her and me and the chances of this working out long term.
I had a nice chat with her yesterday, and that confirmed my suspicion. He is so afraid of hurting either one of us, that he tries to keep things too separate. Which is impossible. I don't cease to exist when he is with her, or visa versa. Better (in my opinion) to be normal about it from the start instead of trying to "fix" this later on.
It is also difficult for him to deal with it. It still feels wrong for him. And I know him well enough and long enough to not let him get away with it (in a positive way, meaning making him talk about her with me) but I cannot do anything the other way around.