NOTICING LITTLE THINGS
DH has stopped with that "I try" thing he was doing a few weeks back. I still don't know if he was digesting something and has come through it or what.
And then later he casually mentioned something like "I was thinking about it. Examining my feelings while out with kids (a playdate)... questioning how I'd feel with you out on a date. And I felt fine. I'd hope you were having a nice time."
The “I try” thing was a vague thing pinging my wife intuition but this one was just announced without my asking anything.
Another time it was me directly asking about how he'd feel with me having Another.
"Amused? Me being with someone else leaves you feeling amused?
Odd choice of vocabulary."
"Yes. Amused. Oh, I'm sure sooner or later some jealous maybe but when I stop to think about it? If my needs are being met, why feed the jealous? My needs are met. If my needs aren't met -- we'd talk. So I'll go with amused in general. You are cute all goofy."
"Great. I exist to amuse you." I joked.
"Yep. Come here and amuse me now."
Once in a while he asks me if he's going to far when he's yanking my chain on my crushes. I told him I enjoy the banter so no. I'd tell him if he was going to far. Me? I'm the one that's amused he enjoys that so much.
I love that big shit eating grin of his.
I check in to make sure I don't take good natured teasing too far. He says he's fine.
So.... things are quiet, pleasant. We continue to talk, but not in any kind of a rush. We continue to process alone and together. Not in any kind of a rush.
It feels fun!
Had a lovely day to ourselves. Got kid to school and then jumped back into bed to frolic. Lots of chain yankin' there. Whee.
Then brunch and errands with a lot of conversation – school things, parenting things, relationship things (our marriage) and more relationship things (polyshipping and assessing a crush and why they fall short right now if it was a potential and not just a crush) and schedules this week and plans for the weekend. And did I want his tomato off his sandwich?
And this is what I love. Peaceful, playful. Normal, nothing to get all bent out of shape over. Just... living life.
Sometimes I think people make polyshipping to be a bigger deal than it is. It's just relationshipping.
Now determining if all players have could grow the skills to be ABLE TO polyship like it is not a big deal?
There's the crux of it.