Originally Posted by Livingmybestlife
It was my understanding that you didn't cut things off with her. Until after an blew thing off both you and the children. Sorry for the misunderstanding. My opinion stand if she was still your partner she would have spoken to you to at least find out hoe the little one were.
Our relationship ended on 30th March. Everything happened 23 days prior, so it was still fresh. The events leading up to the end and her behaviour towards my children were what ultimately made me make the decision to end it. Not returning calls and just making no effort at all for them. I reached out to her every day in some form, and it was ignored.
After our break-up, I understood that she was still upset with him and then me, but there was no excuse while she and I were still together. I expected a call at the very least. Matt left but never stopped talking to them. Our nanny played a huge part in that because he wanted nothing to do with me, but they had it worked out. He only talked to me but once every couple of days on the second week, but he talked to our daughter every day he was away. I know at some point they had been on Skype, too, so he had seen them. Matt was upset enough to not only offer me a divorce but he presented me with a model parenting plan to avoid a long, contentious battle. That was when it hit me that it was not just an empty threat. He was serious. Even with all of that, he did not let his anger towards me disrupt the flow of parenting.
I was pissed off at Si, but I wanted to give her a chance to fix it, so I forgave her. Matt knew she had been distant, but I did not tell him just how distant. I kind of presented like she had been busy with work and caught up in her thoughts. He thought she was being distant because of him, how he had treated her, and what he had said, so he later apologised. I did not tell him about the unreturned calls, missed recitals, ignoring the outings, and all that. That much I kept to myself because I knew he would never let her be around them if I had told him. He was not going to be fair. After talking to our daughter and my reassurance that there was nothing more he needed to know, this was how he ended up issuing a pseudo apology last month. The apology issued was solely for the purpose of allowing Si to continue to have a relationship with our children and nothing else. He apologised for how he handled the situation. These were the only two reasons he went along with it. Once Matt found out the full story in counselling, his forgiveness went out the window.