Thank you Nancyfore. I totally agree with what you've written. I have no doubt this will end in disaster, and I've told my wife that. I also told her I would not trust everything C tells her about her marriage (AKA: we never ever have sex and therefore STD's are not a concern), since an untruthful person is probably untruthful in more than the one relationship. Not to mention the fact that because it's a secret we both have to think twice in terms of who we can discuss it with and how truthful WE can be with some friends (e.g from her work). I feel like I'm being pushed back into the closet. It sucks all around.
Problem is, whenever I bring these concerns up, R gets very mad at me and acts as if I was trying to rain on her parade. Which in a way I am. She says she doesn't give a damn about any of it right now. How can I deal with that? I just wait, hoping the fire will at some point relax somewhat, and for my moral, respectful, honest and kind wife to regain her senses. Anything else in your experience I should be doing?