Kk, i gave him the control speech instead of the NRE speech because of fiancee's remark about "not rushing into education at the expense of our relationship" (paraphrased). Any person with twice as much time to have experiences as another should never try to talk the other out of pursuing an education, particularly when the younger person is sure they want to do it and is not asking for help deciding whether or not to. I feel very strongly about this and no amount or type of poly dogma is going to convince me otherwise.
Not saying i am right about this woman; i have been and could be wrong. But what i believe about relationships and education and all that remains steadfast nevertheless.