We have lived together 10 years, openly poly almost 4 years after an affair.
Bf and dh wouldnt be friends or roommates under other circumstances. They do it for me and the kids.
Lots written in my blog on here and in my personal blog aafteota.wordpress.com
I advise take it slow, talk about toilet paper rolls, toothpaste lids, trash going out, all neat freaks? Someone clutter-prone?
One of our biggest issues is the frequency bf cleans out the catbox for his cat. Dh and i both feel this is a daily chore. Bf is a "when it bothers me" person. The floorplan of our home puts the carbox in the laundry room (bathrooms arent big enough) and thats as far from bf's room as possible-near ours. Constant argument.
He does have his own room and I sleep in dh's room. I have my own room if i need space. But mostly use it for visiting grandbabies and my craft stuff.
"Love As Thou Wilt"