I read what you guys said, and you are right. I did not think they were ready to meet each other. But my wife requested the meeting, and U agreed to it. Today my wife asked me to call U so she could meet her, so I did. It went amazingly well. So they both want to meet each other. I thought this would take a while, but they both seem to want to like each other as soon as possible. I was not expecting things to go so fast.
I'm kind of nervous. I expected, after what happened, that this would take weeks or months while everyone got over being hurt. But they want to meet each other now.
I also went and talked to a therapist today about the situation. I liked her very much. After I had described how these women make me feel, before I even asked a question about it, she recommended finding a polyamory support group. She also offered to counsel us as a group, although I think that might be a little premature. But she was very supportive.
So now I am supposed to set up a dinner date for the three of us tomorrow night. I want these women to become friends. I'm hoping all I have to do is introductions and then sit back and let them talk. I don't know much about being a mediator. I was thinking that we should get a table, so that everyone has their own side, rather than a booth where I would have to sit on one side or the other. Opinions?
evad, I agree with you. While kkxvlv has a point about not hurting feelings, the fact is that these women are complementary, not identical twins. My wife is a classic type 'A', driven and running her own company. U is just the opposite, passive and laid back. When I was cheating, when my wife's aggressive personality was driving me nuts, I would go see U and she would calm me down and lower my blood pressure. I was then able to go back to my wife and appreciate her sharp wit and aggressive drive without banging my head against the wall.
I don't have a problem taking my time. I want everyone to be happy. I understand that if momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy. I now have two mommas to make happy.