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Old 05-03-2013, 12:01 AM
Rix Rix is offline
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Nowhere in particular
Posts: 8

@opalescent- Yeah, it kinda sucks, but I am learning to roll with the punches. He's definitely a piece of my heart and if we can only be friends, then that's more than enough. I just want him to stop hurting.

Update on the situation.

My husband and GF are being awesomely supportive of me in this and I love them to pieces for it. Hubby and I talked and with his advice and constructive criticism I decided to take a little action.

I went above W's head and messaged his SO to ask her to talk to him. Why did I do this? Because I've done it before for friends that had semi-dense partners. Said friends, like W, were uncomfortable with their own feelings and rather than communicate and work it out, they'd rather bottle it up and cause themselves grief instead of "inconveniencing" their partners with their problems. It's a tough sort of love but all I do is say to the partner: "Please talk to your partner. S/He really needs to talk to you." That's it. I don't give any details and if they ask for clarification, I just restate my request. It usually sparks communication for the involved parties and 9/10 times it leads to conflict, discussion, and resolution. It isn't always my place to do it, but some people just need a little push like that...

That was the 1/10 case this time. W's SO demanded he tell her what was wrong, so he did. She got incredibly irritated with him for it, argued her point, wouldn't let him speak any further, and has not talked to him since. I again tried speaking to her to clarify some things and she has not responded to my messages.

Sure, I come off as a pushy, nosy jerk, and I know I can't fix problems for people, but when I see something so painful that could be fixed so easily, I just can't sit still off to the side. Especially when W keeps howling about it.

I am going to let her cool off before trying again, but I hope this will open W's eyes as to what he's holding on to.
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