Well, Hermes responded to my message the day after I sent it. It was a very well written, thought out reply. Basically he said that his schedule sucks and is impacting all his relationships (loves, FWB, friends) negatively. He doesn't think he can pursue a relationship with anyone at this point, and in fact his primary relationship is sufferring too. Said the best he can offer me (or anyone) is "very close friends with benefits."
I told him I wasn't sure how physical I wanted to be with someone I could only see once in a while and wanted to hold off on going further with regards to sex. I do want to continue to see him as he's available. I said that I thought he was unhappy with his current job/schedule and asked if he was looking for another, not just so that I could see him, but because it seems to be interfering with his life.
That was 2 days ago. Haven't heard back yet. But writing him made the uncertainty and anxiety I was feeling go away. I love having it all out on the table and I'm ready to move forward, whatever direction that is these days.