I just don't get the division and judgement that seems to be arising with increasing regularity around couples.
How's this for a reason:
Maybe these couples you refer to did something to earn that judgment. If you are not part of the problem, then what's your problem?
It does not seem to me as if you started this thread to discuss privilege and try to debunk myths or misconceptions about couples and privilege. It seems like this is a thinly-veiled attempt to justify treating "secondaries" as such. Anyone who has read your blog can decide for themselves whether or not they agree with that.