Thread: BDsm
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Old 04-25-2013, 10:37 PM
nycindie's Avatar
nycindie nycindie is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Magdlyn View Post
Quote:
Originally Posted by nycindie View Post
And how would they know the subs are really who they say they are?
I'm not sure what you mean by this. Not really a sub? Not really the gender or age or whatever that they say they are? A sub can send pix or get on cam even if their Dom/me doesn't want to. But I can imagine some Dom/mes who would be ok with getting on cam themselves.
I was referring to their identity. Does everyone stay anonymous or do they know each other's real names and contact info?

Quote:
Originally Posted by BrigidsDaughter View Post
Wendigo is involved in an LDR D/s relationship . . . he collared her last month.
How did he do that? Did he send her an actual collar in the mail and keep the key? I saw some references to being a "keyholder." It seemed that the Dommes would treat the key (whether of a collar or chastity device) as proof of... something. I guess the sub sends pics of themselves wearing it?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tonberry View Post
Long distance, you can do things like require someone to go to the bathroom at work at a specific time and take pictures of themselves naked (for instance of their genitals) or even ask them to masturbate and film it. They'd send you the "proof", but really, they do it because they want to, so there isn't really a need to enforce it.
Hmmm. In this blog I found, there were more than a few Dommes who say their policy is "Do not ever send me pictures of you naked or talk to me about sex." Many will create videos and send pics to subs as rewards, but it seems even more will NOT cam or do things like that, and look down a little bit on those who do -- but they will talk on the phone with their subs or slaves, to tell them what to do (I guess). For them, it's all about the power exchange and they don't want sex or sexy pics/videos involved. I could never, ever trade sexy or naked pics or videos with anyone, even in an established long-term relationship. You just don't know where that stuff would wind up.

I am just trying to grasp the concept of domming and I would think that the online element adds more of a challenge.

Some day I am going to make a documentary about this stuff. Even though it's not for me and some things about BDSM disturb me, some of it fascinates me to no end!
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An excellent blog post on hierarchy in polyamory:
solopoly.net/2014/10/31/why-im-not-a-secondary-partner-the-short-version/

Last edited by nycindie; 04-25-2013 at 10:47 PM.
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