Originally Posted by JaneQSmythe
One thought, if your wife talked to her friend about these things (which I think is a good idea anyway - how can you develop a relationship with someone if you keep significant parts of you life from them?), AND she was willing, would you be OK with her watching your kids while you went to counseling IF you didn't object to an equal amount of time for them alone to develop their relationship? Just a thought (you and your wife get counseling nights on Tuesdays and she and your wife get date-nights on Thursdays)...
That is a good idea. I have no problem with them going and doing there own thing. The way I look at is if my wife is happy so am I, for the most part. The only stumbling block with what you mentioned is my wife would have to tell her friend. Which she doesn't want to because she is afraid it will scare her friend away. Her friend will think that she is going to cause problems in our marriage, she has had some other poly relationships that have not ended well.
My biggest issue right now is I want an intimate relationship with my wife. I want the intensity that i see with them. My wife has said to try and find that with her friend. But, i'm not sure about that. I would prefer my wife and i worry that if i try to find that with her friend i will find that I can't do that and then i don't know what to do because I may find then that i don't want to do sexual things with them anymore. Then a decision will have to made as to how to procede, and my wife has told me that she will not give this up.
A lot of my problem is i over think situations. After typing all this I wondering if I just need to find a way to put these emotions on a back burner and let things develop?