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Old 04-22-2013, 08:13 PM
CherryBlossomGirl CherryBlossomGirl is offline
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 212
Default Not just for me.

That's the thing with this list though - it's not just for me. It holds advice, experiences and struggles that I've seen over and over again in poly couples opening up, and the emerging pop-poly-culture of couple-prejudice (in part because of Franklin's article).

I'm thinking of a basic how to list. Covering the basics so that there is some kind of concise list of discussion topics for people entering into poly. If people don't, say, have a conversation about how to be good stewards of NRE, it can get away from them rather swiftly. Having conscious and condensed tools that don't come in the form of a large book (of which there are now several, more being written, I'm sure) can be pretty dang helpful.

I got the idea too from the selection of 'rules' that my sister and her partner shared with me that I turned into a concise list - it was condensed knowledge on how to maintain an established/primary partnership while opening up to emotionally connected/sexual relationships with other people. It wasn't a Bible, it was a list of guidelines and resulted in some super provoking conversations, several private messages thanking me for posting it, and discussions in my own life that were super beneficial. Lists of established boundaries/rights/whatever you want to call them can be a really great springboard for finding your own way, based on a tried, tested and true framework from more experienced members of the 'poly' community.

It's like if someone wrote a list, "Helpful Guidelines for Unicorn Hunters" it could condense huge swathes of experience and knowledge and boil it down into the most frequently tripped over issues in newly forming triads.

Don't know if I'm making any sense.....

Last edited by CherryBlossomGirl; 04-22-2013 at 08:17 PM.
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