there is a lack of controlling behaviors; wanting each other to have the freedom to be themselves is inherent
Again-no one person can directly change another. But when we TRY TO we destroy ourselves and the other person. We negate their ability to positively impact us, and we negate our ability to positively impact them.
Each person is created with their own gifts, their own abilities.
When we come together-something within us is drawn to one another.
That something "see's" or senses the "gifts" that we have to give the other person.
BUT if that person tries to control us, they make it impossible for that "something" within us to function and give those gifts to that "something" within them.
Much like she explains in the "Living Happily Ever After" book-when we try to force ourselves to only
use our logical minds to control our lives-we negate our ability to FIND the answers, because they are often in that "creative" part of our minds that WE can't consciously control.
We must LET GO of control for that inner part of us, that inner part that see's, senses and KNOWS what we TRULY need, to do it's work. Therefore we screw ourselves (to be blunt) when we try to exert our controlling behaviors not only upon ourselves-but even more so when we exert it upon others around us.
This quote is only an example of how that happens on the NEXT level.
The first level is what she's talking about in the book-how we do that to ourselves by not allowing our "inner" self to have input in our decisions.
This quote is talking about how that impacts relationships-because after we shut down OUR creative side, we start trying to control other people and IN THAT ATTEMPT we shut down their ability to EITHER stay with us (because they leave so they can continue to allow their creative inner self to function) or their ability to use their creative, inner self-which in turn screws them AND US (and the relationship and the world).