I don't think it's too picky of you to want to hear that she wants to spend time alone with you, and i think you should say to her, "i still want time together just the two of us. I hope you do also. How do YOU feel about that?"
This is not a trick question. It's very straightforward and does not require pinning down of times, durations, and frequencies. If she mumbles things or acts evasive or gets squirmy about it, then she is either not really that into you after all but really wants to get near your husband, OR she is poor at communicating under these circumstances.
I can't continue to advise any further without speculating and assuming a great many things, some of which haven't even happened yet. If you do decide to use the approach i described above, and the answer is something other than "Yes, i DO want to spend time alone with you still", then you will know which thing the answer means by her non-verbal communication ( body language and eye contact).