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Old 02-28-2009, 11:47 PM
thetriofus thetriofus is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Baltimore
Posts: 8
Default are double standards fair?

Please bear with us, we are somewhat new to poly relationships and do not wish to offend anyone. Realizing there are many variations of polyamory the underlying purpose and definition seems to be multiple loves, not multiple sex partners. Again, not wanting to offend anyone so bear with us. Florida girl said "Well, last night he did it. Met another woman, had sex told me all about it. " and " We have discussed me having someone to play with too " . No where in the post did we see mention of multiple loves and relationships, Just that she loves her primary. We are a little confused as to whether the problem is primarily about the sex or the love.
We are a MfM triad vee if we had to actually label ourselves, ( we kinda wouldnt like to). We (M/M) are great friends and deeply in love with the Fem but not each other and it works well for us. What we have come too the conclusion of is that Our Fem Would have serious difficulties if either of us males were to fall in love with another Fem. Is that Selfish? Greedy? Wrong? Double standard? Who cares, it is how our relationship works. Obviously no matter how Florida girls relationship works, it's not working out very well right now we agree. Our relationship being a "double standard" works well for us because no one has a problem with it being that way. If you or anyone feel there is a double standard "problem" discussion is the key as seventh has described in his post. Keith we do respectfully disagree, yes it is a two way street with a lot of compromise. Sometimes that compromise is Knowing what your partners can handle, weighing that against your desires, and sometimes the compromise is , as in our case "the best thing for the relationship is to just not go there"
Thank you all who read this and we hope we havent pissed anyone off. lol
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