So feeling the love on this forum, it's awesome.
Yesterday. Davis and I spent the day together, went to a cultural event, napped, fucked, had dinner. Very natural, easy, happy. We fell asleep together. I sleep SO soundly with him, whereas I'm restless sleeping with almost anyone else.
Today, a group of us went to the spa, including Gia, Eric, and Bee.
One thing that I really liked was the way Bee moved seamlessly between the three of us. He was shy around everyone else, to a person, but he was constantly calling for Mommy, or for Daddy, or for Anna. It's just so moving, and I have to admit that I like all of our friends seeing that. And I had so much fun chasing after him.
Another thing that I really liked was when my friend and I were eating something spicy at one point, and it happened that I didn't have a glass of water. I almost always have water with me, but I had an iced tea, so I wasn't TOO concerned, and I certainly didn't mention anything. Eric got up to get some water for himself, and when he came back he had two glasses in his hands, and gave the other to me. There was so much going on, all sorts of conversations and friends littered about, the baby running around, and he noticed that I needed something without me indicating it in any way. He sees me and my comfort matters to him. It's not like he was ever some completely oblivious ass to me, by any means, but... it's different than it used to be. It may not be love, but it sure as hell feels like something similar. Maybe it just feels like family.
Yet another thing that I really liked was when Gia asked me to rub her shoulders in one of the hot tubs. She used to be so reticent about accepting things like that from me, and now she asks for them without hesitation. I can't begin to say how important and pleasant that shift is. I feel understood and appreciated. Not to mention how enjoyable it was to be in that sort of environment, making her feel good in that way. Mmmm, nice.
A final thing that I really liked was getting dirty/loving texts from Clay in the middle of the day, and then noticing that he posted about me on his tumblr today for the first time and said very nice things about me as a person, talked about our future plans, talked about Izzy being supportive and what a relief that was to him, etc. All of these things that I've fought for with Gia and Eric -- being seen, appreciated, understood -- they come so naturally and completely with him. We communicate and support each other and complement each other and turn each other on in ways that feel so intuitive and natural. I'm used to these things being a struggle, a long process of unfolding and adjusting.
Both types of dynamics are valuable, I'm in NO way saying that my connection with him is worth more than the harder-won connection with Gia. But... wow, it's just such an amazing experience, to have something so rich just fall into one's lap.
Fuck, I'm just so fucking lucky.