I've almost replied to this 4 times now.
I think what I want to say is, yes I'm enabling her. Are you saying I should break up with her on principle?
Me: 40 straight male in a V with
Wife: Kay - mono female - married 18 years
LDR girlfriend: Susan - poly female - 3 year relationship
Stakes - very intimate friend
Ironically named Farmgirl - local interest