Originally Posted by NutBusterX
Nance and I agree that snooping usually leads to finding information that isn't received well and is easily taken out of context and that if we truly trust each other, simply asking about things we want to know is best.
I hear that Nut, an old friend of mine (always had bad communication skills to be honest) turned up to one of my birthday dinners once with new bf in tow. She confided to me that she was mad at him because she had read said bf's texts and found one from Kelly, asking about going out, she asked me if she should say something, I said 'You don't know what that is about, so best not to put your relationship at risk admitting you looked through his private texts etc'..........
Of course a few drinks later she decided to accuse him of being a cheating bastard and 'YEAH I saw that text from Kelly on your phone....'
"That is Kelly from WORK, (Steve) Kelly!!!!!"
So, bearing in mind that this was the first time I met him, the bf was embarrassed at being shown up around strangers, I was embarrassed as I had other friends there and my so called friend just pretty much ruined my birthday celebration and she had totally ignored my advice making an exhibition of herself by making wrong assumptions.
Course that relationship failed and she hasn't been able to maintain a healthy relationship since.
(FWIW, this is actually not all about the texts, yes it is wrong that she felt entitled to, but actually her boiling up with resentment and letting it come out after a few glasses of vino is an unhealthy pattern of behaviour that she has exhibited from our teen years. She is often desirous of a relationship but then tends to ruin them by behaving in an inappropriate manner).