That went not as well as I wanted, but at least things are a little more clarified.
I finally saw Falcon today. Previously, I did break down and send a couple more messages and texts in the intervening time and found out he had been out of country, actually, with no access to phone and only spotty wifi. So that mystery solved..
Anyway, today I asked him about JQ and said I wanted to make sure I wasn't stepping on any toes and that I'd like to talk to her, meet her, etc. He told me more about her, how they'd met, things like that, and that what we (he and I) were doing was definitely not stepping on any toes, but that if we were in a relationship certainly he would want us all to meet and have everyone on the same page and above board, absolutely. Because he'd been in relationships were it wasn't, and it blew up pretty badly. Did you catch that part in there? Yeah. "if" we were in a relationship. Ouch.
So - looks like Marcus called it - Falcon and I talked a lot more cause I really wanted to make sure, but he's into me, but apparently not that into me, in other words, he doesn't have time for another relationship, what with work and family and hobbies and so on and so forth. I talked about being very busy too, and how I really didn't logically have a time for much either, but I'd like to continue to see him every once in a while outside of rehearsals and performing, so I'd make time if he asked... crickets.
Yeah. So my question's changed now. How do I get rid of the excess emotions and feelings and just be friends? I really just need to get through the next rehearsal (Sunday) and then the performance (Saturday), and then I guess I won't see him but every few months or so, so I'll be able to cope. And I know it's not the end of the world. But I'm still sad.