Good to meet you; I've been a member for just about a year now. It's interesting to hear of your situation, and I like the unique approach you took to things. One might call it a "relationship sabbatical," although I'll bet your parental relationship with your kids benefitted from it.
So now you are thinking about maybe getting into a new romantic relationship. Just from what I've read on this thread, it sounds like something relatively light and not too committed would be more your style. Do you think "friends with benefits" is something you'd consider?
I figure there's no need to rush anything; take some time to contemplate your feelings and what works for you, and just ease into the "dating scene" or perhaps better yet, just getting to know people on a platonic level and if it leads into something romantic, well that's nice too.
It sounds like you've taken the lessons of the past into stride, and it seems encouraging that you and your wife usually get along okay. I take it things got pretty rough awhile back there.
If the baby turns out (or appears) to be the "other guy's," do you think you will still think of her as sort of like being your own child? I am curious what your feelings are, but if I'm prying (something I sometimes do), you need not answer that particular question.
Heh, sorry if I started to ramble there; I do that sometimes too.