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Old 04-07-2013, 02:19 AM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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I think you like being in control, but you call it insecurity and anxiety. It actually seems that any situation where someone else has a say about what's going on throws you off and you don't like it. You sound on the verge of a tantrum. This can't be good for you. You are stressing needlessly. I think you would benefit from not being in control. Let life be a little unpredictable and uncertain. Let go of the reins, let your husband manage his relationship and you manage yours (meaning yours with him, NOT his with her), try not to get so bent out of shape when things don't go your way, and stop being so nosy. Be a voyeur with someone else's sex life. Believe me, I say this in all seriousness and to be helpful - I think it would be good for you.
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An excellent blog post on hierarchy in polyamory:
solopoly.net/2014/10/31/why-im-not-a-secondary-partner-the-short-version/

Last edited by nycindie; 04-07-2013 at 02:21 AM.
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