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Old 04-06-2013, 10:32 PM
LovingRadiance's Avatar
LovingRadiance LovingRadiance is offline
Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 5,510

And THAT Fol is exactly the impression I had from what you have been writing.
I hope you know-its not at all my intent to step on your toes or speak for you.
I only spoke up because I have felt those feelings, made similarly difficult choices and I find it concerning that such a strong stance of you not being free to share your story where it stands today-because of a choice made (1-2wks ago?).

Similarity to a comparison previously brought up:
I am bisexual.
16 or so years ago I ended my romantic relationship with my girlfriend.
I embarked on a relationship with a man (Maca) and have not dated a woman since.
Many in the LGBT community have pointedly identified me as "an ally" because the last 15 years of my life I have lived "as a straight woman".
Likewise the straight community has pointedly identified me as straight on the basis of my lifestyle "choice".

I am anal retentive about terminology in some areas-because of how I have been shut out and isolated from community over how I APPEAR to be living and the assumption that somehow defines who I am.
But-if I were just talking to someone and not defensive already, and I didnt SPECIFY that I am JUST living a straight relationship curcumstance-if I didnt take time to iron out the difference between "I am married to a man and I don't see that ever changing" to "I am married to a man and dont see that changing due to circumstances that I have obligation for. However, If thise curcumstances had been managed differently in the past I just as easily could have been married to a woman,"-
The assumption (based upon my words) could easily be made that I AM straight and therefore have no business posting on a board dedicated to LGBT. But-that assumption would be erroneous AND the ensuing damage and drama could easily be avoided by a mod simply asking me privately if I could explain my interest in bein involved in such a board.
The ensuing response being that as a bi woman being stuck in a hetero dynamic and surrounded by people who dont understand my pain and turmoil over not living bi-I sought out a community that does-where I could express myself openly and be free to connect with ither lgbt people.

Same basic scenario.
"Love As Thou Wilt"