Originally Posted by Fiona
Looking back, no. That was my husband who broke a boundary.
Then my partner did, twice in the space of a few months, and violated my consent by having unprotected sexual contact with someone who has an STI and then having sex with me without informing me of this.
It is very upsetting to me that people can 1. agree to boundaries for reasons of sexual health and safety and 2. regularly and arbitrarily break them.
I'm pretty cynical about all of this, just now.
So..you're not overreacting. Safe sex boundaries might be the #1 most important thing there is - having different tolerances is totally fine, but not being honest that yours are different than a partners is not fine. If we can't choose our own risk levels, then its pretty much impossible to feel safe, trusted, and trusting.
Anyway, somebody who doesn't treat you well now and wont be kind and really hear when you have concerns (whether they agree with your viewpoint or not) well..you can do better, so since you've decided to do better, don't waste too much time dealing with regret, if you can help it.