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Old 04-05-2013, 07:34 AM
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SchrodingersCat SchrodingersCat is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Saskatchewan
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Originally Posted by BoringGuy View Post
I have a friend that sometimes does this. I'll say something, and he'll answer with sentences that are constructed in such a way that i can tell he made assumptions and extrapolated incorrectly from them.
Hubby is the worst for that. He still carries a lot of baggage from his childhood, and I've changed a whole lot since we first met. I had unreasonable "only child syndrome" expectations of how life should work, and I made a lot of unrealistic demands. So now, whenever I open my mouth, he hears either his mother or former-me. It takes a lot of patience and careful explaining to get him on the same page.

Fortunately, he's always willing to give me the benefit of the doubt. He'll react strongly and negatively, I'll say "Why are you reacting this way? I just meant ___." and he'll explain what he "understood." Then I'll explain that I can see how his response is reasonable with that understanding, but seriously that's totally not what I meant.

But in all fairness, this trend is not unreasonable. People always carry their own histories and expectations into any interaction. It could be that everyone else who said abcxyz also said def...uvw. Or that if he were to say abcxyz, he would really mean abcdef...uvwxyz. Not saying that's a helpful, constructive way to converse and interact... just saying, it's not hard to understand why that happens.
As I am sure any cat owner will be able to tell you,
someone else putting you in a box is entirely different
from getting into a box yourself.
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