Why doesn't your DH like this man? I have to ask.
If I understand right, you can continue fertility treatment even if you form a poly circle, you just have to have the new person tested for STI's and have him officially recognized on the paperwork.
Correct me on my info so far, and indulge me on my questions. I may then be able to give some helpful input.
Love means never having to say, "Put down that meat cleaver!"