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Old 04-04-2013, 01:15 AM
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AnnabelMore AnnabelMore is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2010
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RainyGrlJenny View Post
Hooray Annabel!! Everything sounds amazing, and I am so so happy for you. I was reading your post and my officemate asked me why I was grinning like a fool.
Eee, thank you.

I've been doing a LOT of grinning like a fool lately.

Clay and I haven't seen each other since the dance party this past Friday. He invited me to an event on Monday, but I turned him down to go to an exercise class with Gia instead. I wanted to see her, wanted to have the workout, wanted to try to make that night more of a regular thing for she and I. We had a lovely time, but I have to admit that I've kind of been kicking myself for missing the opportunity with him. He and I are both VERY busy right now, and scheduling time together has been nigh impossible.

I started missing him badly on Tuesday night, and it's been an on-and-off ache since then. The thing that makes it ok is knowing that he feels the same way. He takes the time to tell me about the ways in which he's missing me. We always have good chats, whether they're quick check-ins or longer talks in which we share things about our lives and about our desires in this relationship. We both seem to be very good at making the other feel valued and respected... *sigh* It's really nice.

I just looked back at my chat log and we had two 45-minute conversations online today. That's an hour and a half of talking! And it's been just enough to make me feel calmer and a little more peaceful, not enough to actually sate me. There are things that I want to talk to him about that I'm only going to feel comfortable saying in person. And, of course, it's only in person that I can touch him, kiss him, just revel in his proximity. WOW, do I have it bad. Again, the only thing that keeps this from being awful is the fact that he freely admits to feeling exactly the same.

During our last conversation, just now, I explained that I think I need to know when I'm going to see him next (I'd given him some possible dates, at his request, but he hadn't responded with a workable option yet). If I know when to expect it, I can look forward to it. In contrast, when things are open and nebulous, I become preoccupied and feel lonely. He said that made sense, and promised to look at his schedule and give me a firm date very soon. I feel a little bad for trying to pin him down, when he has people out of town that he also needs to coordinate with, which is of course going to be trickier. On top of that, his work schedule just changed so that he only has a single day off per week, he's responsible for a major portion of a BIG event coming up soon which has been stressing him out, and he's starting to get a cold. Bleh. But mostly I feel good for identifying what I need, communicating that, and having him hear, understand, and agree to meet it.
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Me, 30ish bi female, been doing solo poly for roughly 5 years. Gia, Clay, and Pike, my partners. Davis, ex/friend/"it's complicated." Eric, Gia's husband. Bee, Gia and Eric's toddler.
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