Originally Posted by cinnamonswing
i can see why someone would attribute this reaction (or at least parts of it) to patriarchy but i think this is not just a reaction men have towards woman-woman relationships but also many women have towards man-man relationships. thinking that it is less of a threat if your partner has sex with someone that is not of your gender, period. so maybe it is more of a heteronormative thing. but i also think it has a lot to do with not wanting to feel like you could be replaced.
Actually, I remember reading studies that within people in an opposite-sex relaitonship who didn't care about their partner having sex with one gender, but cared about their partner having sex with the other... both males and females, on average, were jealous of a male partner but not a female one. Only a minority of males and a minority of females were more jealous if their partner was with a woman than with a man.
Note that it's within people who care about one and not the other. Plenty of people were jealous of both or neither.
But yeah, while they justified it in different ways ("I'm a man so if she dates other men she might replace me" vs "I'm a woman so other women aren't a threat but men can bring him something I can't!") both seem to be influenced by patriarchy.