Sounds like the most important thing to you is you don't want to hide this poly relationship from your circle of friends. In addition, I'd suggest sharing some of the posts you've been reading (and writing) on this site, ask him to read them, and point out the parts for you that made you think, "Yes -- this is what I want." Or even, "I don't want this!"
When explaining to your man what you want in this poly relationship, try to be as specific as possible.
Love means never having to say, "Put down that meat cleaver!"