Originally Posted by lovefromgirl
I always end up with an uneven number of arms on either side of the hug. Just so you know. <3
I hang around on "straight people" boards, too, not just polyamory.com.
They judge cheaters and the people who help them cheat pretty harshly, but a few of us are non-monogamous by nature, so we've been teaching them the difference between ethical non-monogamy and cheating. Mostly it has to do with the "ethical" part, which I'm guessing your friend isn't understanding too well right now.
What's important is that you aren't letting her dictate your values. I'm proud of you for that. I've been there; I've lost friends who thought I was hell-bound in some way or another. Those same people accused me of some nasty things in a very public place. (Those same people, ironically, spent high school getting drunk all the time, but God loves a boozer better than a queer!)
If it helps, we're here next time you have a lonely night. Stay strong and don't forget that your username means "beautiful", 'kay?
Ah, hugs are always appreciated - even the lopsided one
And thank you for your message (((lovefromgirl)))
It's interesting that I should be in the relationship I'm in at this point in my life. I think most people spend their teens and twenties searching for who they are and I definitely did a lot of that during those time periods in my life. But I also spent a lot of time around family and friends who seem to be very comfortable in living the way that they always have. Of course there's nothing wrong with that and if makes them happy, I wish them the best. But I feel like I've changed so much, that I want to truly live life and welcome change rather than fear it. The true realization of that really didn't hit me until I met my boyfriend, right as I was about to turn 30.
I was raised very traditionally, went to Catholic school through high school and basically hung out with the same friends through grade school. I live in the same town I lived in when I grew up. I look at those friends and they're all following the same path, they've all followed what we were all taught we we were supposed to do. And I followed that same path for so long but then just couldn't do it anymore. I think my leaving that path, my being in a relationship that challenges everything they've been taught, is disappointing to them. But I just can't live my life according to their rules anymore.
It's sad that this will mean that most of those relationships will become strained but I can't help but look forward to all that I will gain.