Grain of Salt - or a cupful when needed.
Hey AZ. Glad that you're all communicating, and that you feel more comfortable, and are happy with how things are moving forward. Just KNOW that you have a right to feel what you need to feel, and to ask for things to slow down or pause when you need them to. Your experience is just as important and valid as anyone's, and coming from a place of fear when moving things forward might not merit you the same happiness as waiting until you are truly ready.
You'll need to grow a thick skin on this forum. You'll also find friends who will support you and allow you to find your own way. You'll find the blog section of the forum must less peppered with "advice" that hurts, and more people just wanting to read and learn from your story. I have made true friends on this forum - you will find yours, so don't worry about the rest. They present a viewpoint, and while it's worth considering, the stuff that helps you find your truth is the most valuable of all. Don't take it personally - we're all strangers who know nothing about your life at present - and those that mind don't matter, and those that matter won't mind.
Cheers, and good luck on your poly journey.
northhome: Kudos to you & yours.