Wife identified part of the issue is that touch and therefore sex is one of the few ways she differentiates between people she loves as opposed to is casual friends with. As such it carries deep meaning for her, and would be hard for her to share.
So, somehow I have to convince her she's not getting any less of me.
The good news is that I'm as happy as I've ever been even not having all of T. But I'm greedy. Things tend to work out well for me, so I don't stay with content and strive for more.
We talked last Friday, so I need to give it more time. I was hoping I might convince the wife to let T join me on a business trip (and convince T to come, that would be a different conversation) in May, but that's not going to happen, so time to focus on July.