Good for you! You've identified what the root of it could be in you.
Could stop judging the feeling. Just accept it. Let it blow on through without thinking extra thoughts on it. See if that attitude serves you better.
More like "I feel the need for reassure" and stop there rather than "I feel the need for reassure... I am so clingy and needy."
Could be looking for the COULDS rather than parking it in the judgement zone hamster wheel. Move it FORWARD to the "doing something to alleviate the need place" instead.
"I feel the need for reassure" =
I could ask for it from BF.
I could reassure myself.
I could do both.
I could do nothing.
I could think of other ways to meet this need.
I have many options for how to handle this.
I know I can handle this."
Feed the "asssured" bucket and not the "insecure" bucket within you. The one that wins is the one you feed.
So you chose to do something about it. That's great! Asked what you needed. Now wait for the new feelings after the new behavior to ensue. Hopefully you will feel better.