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Old 03-20-2013, 07:25 AM
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SchrodingersCat SchrodingersCat is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Saskatchewan
Posts: 2,400

Originally Posted by Vixtoria View Post
Okay going to play devil's advocate here. See, some married or just really long term couples, come into poly through not so honest means. Which means when they decide to try it honestly, there's already trust issues. Now as the new person in a relationship with one of them, that's totally not your fault. It does, however, mean that things typically go slower. That's what we had to do. Go slow, lots of communications.
Right. But that's onus on the husband, not the husband's girlfriend. Trust is built by giving small allowances bit by bit, and then checking whether or not they were abused. You give them a little rope, but not enough to hang themselves. How can you build trust if you don't leave any room for mistakes?

Originally Posted by nycindie View Post
Requiring thank you notes? Just how are you expressing genuine appreciation to your metamour if it is a requirement? What self-centered nonsense!
Do you think I can get that blender back from my brother-in-law? I never got a thank-you note, genuine or otherwise. Veto power for wedding gifts!
As I am sure any cat owner will be able to tell you,
someone else putting you in a box is entirely different
from getting into a box yourself.
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