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Old 03-20-2013, 04:37 AM
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SchrodingersCat SchrodingersCat is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Canada
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Originally Posted by BSP83 View Post
Thank you both for your can trust that we have thought A LOT about how it might impact the children. They all know nothing except that S is my best friend and I'm hers. We are all waking a very fine line in front of and around the kids for now, because it's best for them at this point in time.
Don't be so sure. Kids are really observant and intuitive. They pick up on all kinds of things that grown-ups don't give them credit for.

It would be more accurate to say "we haven't told them anything" than to assert that they know nothing.

At some point, you'll need to explain not only polyamory, but your WLM to them. You both recognize that having a D/s lifestyle is a choice you've made conscientiously and deliberately. The kids will inevitably pick up on the power imbalance. If they aren't told explicitly what that's all about, they might grow up thinking that's how marriages are "supposed" to be. If they choose it for themselves, that's all fine and dandy. But like mono or poly, it should be a choice, not just something they do because their parents do it so they think it's what's expected.
As I am sure any cat owner will be able to tell you,
someone else putting you in a box is entirely different
from getting into a box yourself.
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