I am also going to step up immediately the next time I see something in the works that I don't think will be in the best interest of all parties. I think I just didn't want to be the "naysayer", especially since he seems to be pulling out of his funk over Chatty.
GOOD. I am glad you decided to speak up for the well being of all parties and not just bend to the want of ONE party.
This solution sounds way saner than the other way in your situation.
Keep a sharp eye though -- and keep your own job and your own finances
. Preserve you and your children's ability to just move OUT and get a flat elsewhere if any more shenanigans appear.
It's fine to contribute your share toward the household, but you retain financial independence in your own accounts so you can step away if intolerable shenanigans crop up -- your kids depend on you.