Thank you Galagirl. Your responses are always treasures.
Something I sort of left out above is the order of things. We began talking and considering opening a year ago. At that time, and until recently, there was no talk of putting us on hold. It's like she's just run out of desire for me, and is looking to fill it back up, while trying to reassure me that "we" won't be lost in the process. But the dwindling of us, and her distancing, is the exact opposite of reassuring.