Originally Posted by dingedheart
Eth, how long have you been married...and how long have you been open ?
And what would be your ideal relationship contruct regardless of any of these specific players.....what's your vision of perfect?
Do you feel like you had to settle over and over to be in this ?
We have been together for 15 years, married for 12, and we have been open for six!
I think that we have done really good for the most part, and I do love her, so my ideal relationship is what I've had. This baby thing was thrown a real spanner into the works though, and has made me realise that ou need to know when to let a good thing go!
Have I had to settle over and over? Well she is the one that had the affair, she is the one that wanted to open things up, she is the one that fell in love with someone else, she is the one that initially pushed me away and allowed him to be her main lover, and she is the one that had his child, although that was not deliberate! However I'm not gonna pretend that I've been some kind of victim in all this, that would just be a whole bunch of bullshit. I've had a ball, a great time, and I was able to do that because she was the one that did all of the above. There was no bitterness until now!
Alex is more reliable with his time, he is at her beck and call, and in truth, I'm not, and never was. I have always done my own thing, had my own friends, and social life, and done pretty much as I pleased. I never once cheated on her though, never touched another woman without her being present. When she said she wanted to open things up, it would be fair to say that I really went for it, and as I said, I've had a grand time. I never loved anyone but her though!